Read my mind

I know I promised to do a travelblog but I think I need to insert a blog that is of utmost importance to me. I never meant to make it seem like I am taking things for granted. I am truly sorry for making things seem to look like so indifferent.

I would not make any excuses but I just want to clear the air out and put back that boyish smile right where it belong because he deserves it. All I wanted was to pour out every inch of love and passion that I can always give.

Yes, I am a Gemini by zodiac sign and I have somehow believed partly when it describes me as someone who takes up new activities enthusiastically but lacks application. I am the one who would constantly need new interests, flitting from project to project as apparently purposelessly as a butterfly dancing from flower to flower.

I am not sure if it perfectly suits me when they say that "Geminis have a keen, intuitive, sometimes brilliant intelligence..." but one thing I am sure of is that I love cerebral challenges. However, concentration, though intense for a while, does not last.

My mental agility and energy gives me a voracious appetite for knowledge. Without sounding so conceited, I fairly believe that this is true for me ... our intellect is strongly analytical and sometimes gives us so great an ability to see both sides of a question that we vacillate and find it hard to make decisions.

I am fickle when it comes to love? They say that our basic inconsistency of emotional nature is a side to Geminians which can become deeply involved emotionally, and another, hostile to sentimentality, which stands back from a romantic situation, laughing at it and the protagonists in it, including myself while analyzing it intellectually.

They say that I take nothing seriously. One might even argue that inspite of my temporary depth of feeling, for the intensity of involvement lasts only while it is new. That I am superficial, light-hearted, cool, flirtatious and unimaginative in the understanding of the pain that I give others. I completely disagree with this.

Before, it may be true that I like the excitement of the chase, but once I have caught the prey, I lose interest and look around for the next creature to pursue but now he has all changed everything.

I may be talking of myself too much but that's because I want him to see me as to whom I really am. I am not that pretentious or hideous. I don't put my best foot forward just to impress someone. I need to be seen as to what I can give when I catch my prey...and that is all of me.

I never intend to hurt someone. I am just being me. I keep silent when I feel the need to. So I guess I just need someone to respect my silence. It is not that I am hiding something but I just want some moments alone to myself. It might be too hard to understand the complexity of it but it would really pay off sometimes to just trust me especially when I say with my whole heart out "I want to be with you forever...you are my destiny...Jai ho" I mean what I say that is why I only say it once.

Earlier today I was in a trance. Just being with you...spending those precious times with you...sharing our plans and dreams. I thought I didn't need to tell you how much I appreciated every second of that Bora days. I completely forgot that we are exactly of the opposite type. I do cherish everything. It is just I can't find the words to describe the ecstatic happiness that I felt those bonding times. If it's not that important to me, why else would I make it hard for me to bring along our precious little one when I can just tag along myself and enjoy the sun without getting burned? I need not explain more I guess. Just always remember that everything is locked within my heart and that memories are (so you termed) "doubly encrypted".

Like the song playing from the movie Superman : "If you need to belong, here I am, read my mind".